Cats can sometimes be temperamental. Sometimes they love your attention, then the next second they could want to be by themselves.

Oftentimes, a cat will bond more strongly with one person. Why do cats pick a favorite person? Does it mean they don’t want to be around anyone else?

Read below to learn more about cats and their relationships.

Beginnings of Cats and Humans

Cats are smart, and it’s likely that when they figured out that humans are a good source of food and protection, the bond began.

According to the Smithsonian Institute, “Just last month, a study published in the research journal Science secured more pieces in the cat-domestication puzzle based on genetic analyses. All domestic cats, the authors declared, descended from a Middle Eastern wildcat, Felis sylvestris, which literally means ‘cat of the woods.’ Cats were first domesticated in the Near East, and some of the study authors speculate that the process began up to 12,000 years ago.”

Its likely today’s cats choose their favorite person for the same reasons. The younger the cat you get is, the stronger the bond that forms.

Kittens learn to socialize early. Exposure to people, places and sounds early in their development will help them be more well-adjusted. It’s also the case that many cats just have personalities that make them more aloof and less likely to bond with people.

Older, adopted cats can learn to bond too. It’s just a matter of personality.

Why Cats Pick a Favorite Person

When it comes to bonding with cats, two things matter most: communication and personality.


Verbal communication and body language are crucial to developing a healthy relationship with your cat – or any pet! Cats may not seem like big communicators, but they are. They tell us their needs and how they feel in a multitude of ways. It’s your job to anticipate them.

Your relationship with your cat is sure to be successful if you learn to adapt to their preferred method of communication. This may or may not include physical interaction.

A cat may feel safest with a person who respects their space and give them time to warm up to new situations. Usually, this just takes time. It takes time to learn each other’s likes and dislikes. And there tends to be one person in the household that knows how to communicate to your cat’s liking best. That’s why cats choose a favorite person.


We all know that each cat is as unique as any person. Each cat has their own likes and dislikes. Because of this, a cat can be drawn to one person more than others. Because of our own personalities, it just happens that a cat will like being around one person more than others.

We all have those friends that we just ‘click’ with. It’s great to have that person who just gets you and knows how to cheer you up when you’re down. It’s the same with cats. Your cat may click with you, or they may get along better with your spouse or roommate. There’s not much you can do to force your cat into liking you best, but there are some things you can do to foster a better relationship.

How to be Your Cat’s Favorite Person

  • Fostering an early relationship helps – Kittens from the age four to nine weeks have a significant socialization period. It’s best to handle them and expose them to many different sounds and smells. If you can imprint your presence on them during this time, you have a great chance of being a good friend.
  • Provide food and snacks – A cat who doesn’t leave the house obviously relied on their owner to feed them. Be that person. Be the one who is around to feed them and make sure they know it is from you.
  • Positive reinforcement – If you catch your cat doing something you like, be sure to give them a nice pet or a treat. Not only can you train them to do that thing more often, but your cat will foster good feelings toward you.
  • Provide time for play – You need to provide your cat with exercise, so get some toys you can use with them. It will help your cat bond to you. They might even get pooped out and snuggle with you too. Just remember that if your cat seems like they need alone time, give it to them.

While it might seem like a lot of work to get on your cat’s good side, remember that every relationship takes an investment of time. Whether you are spending time with people or your pets, quality time and good feelings is going to go a long way at building that relationship.

Even if your cat pics a favorite person who is not you, it’s not the end of the world. You still can have fun with them.